(no subject)

[alexseanchai]

Dead comm is dead. *pokes at it*

Hi, I'm Ellie, and I have problems with buying things on impulse. This may be related to my thousands of dollars in credit card debt. I have a full-time job which, after monthly expenses, gives me four hundred a month to pay down credit card debt with. Somehow the debt keeps not going down. Does anyone have suggestions for ways to convince myself I don't actually need any of the books and probably don't need any of the crafting supplies I buy?

Comments

[kareila]

I used to overspend on books, music and DVDs, until I quit my job and had to live on a strict budget. This is what helped me curb my habits:

Books - borrow from my local library if they have what I want. If not, request it from paperbackswap.com or look for a used copy locally. Only buy new for certain new releases. Look for discounted or free (non-pirated) ebooks. Read a certain number of books before allowing myself to buy another one.

Music - shop the daily and monthly deals on amazon's MP3 store - often they have albums I want for $5 or less. iTunes has 90 second song previews, NPR.org streams whole albums before their release date, and I just signed up for Spotify which also lets me stream whole albums.

DVDs - again, local library and Netflix - I hardly ever buy DVDs any more.

I am also a compulsive wish-lister. It's cheaper than being a compulsive buyer! Every month or so I will buy $25 worth of stuff for myself from my wish list (that's the amount for free shipping from amazon). If something stays on the list for over a year without me buying it for myself, I probably didn't want it that much!

Cutting back on crafting supplies is harder if you're an active crafter. I spent a lot of money a couple of years ago on knitting supplies when I was learning to knit, and the year before that I spent a lot on jewelry supplies when I taught myself to make necklaces, and in both cases I kind of built a stash and then was able to stop buying everything that looked shiny (because I knew I had nowhere to put it!) Now I try not to go in craft stores at all unless I need something specific for a project, and I always make sure I have a 40% or 50% off coupon - all the big box craft stores put these out regularly.

Hope that helps!

[alexseanchai]

I'm already on paperbackswap.com, with no credits because I keep using them. :( Music I don't tend to buy, because there's last.fm. Netflix is probably out of the question because I live with my parents and they'd look askance at me if I asked to get Netflix, but I'll keep it in mind for the mythical future time when I'm on my own.

Wish lists make sense.

I keep telling myself that what I make with this purchase is guaranteed to sell the minute I put it on Etsy. And then I put off putting it on Etsy. There's like a dozen pairs of earrings sitting on my desk waiting to be priced and photographed. And then nothing on Etsy sells anyway because my photographs are for crap. But sticking to what's already in my stash makes sense.

Thanks!

[waldo]

Where are you located? If you're anywhere near me, I'd be happy to help with your Etsy photographs.

If you're not, shoot me a few and I can give you some feedback. For Etsy any camera will take a 'good enough' picture. It's a lot about 'styling' your product and lighting it well.

I typically try to make my Etsy 'self-sustaining'. I don't buy more stuff until at least one thing has sold. Like a few weeks ago when I went through a rash of sales of my bath and body products, I "let" myself do an order from a soap mold company I've been wanting to try.

If you're doing earrings, you need to *really* promote yourself. It seems everyone and their dog is doing earrings. So much so that I've stopped listing mine for a while. Like you said, it's hard to sell them there.

So maybe when you feel like going out and getting more stuff, instead spend an hour promoting your shop (push them on Twitter, cross post to Facebook/LJ/DW, whatever.) It may satisfy that "LOOK I MADE STUFF WITH STUFF" urge a lot of us crafters have. :)

[alexseanchai]

My Etsy shop's sunbowgems, but there's no need to look at it to find out what's wrong with the pictures. A bunch of them I used a dark red background not realizing it would dominate the picture. A bunch more, I think I had the shutter speed set wrong; everything's all washed out. And the rest are kind of monotonous, because I've only got one blanket with light enough colors and a sufficiently nondistracting pattern to use as a backdrop.

[waywardcats]

Bookmooch has a better points economy in my opinion. Both sites have pluses and minuses, but in the end users generally have Bookmooch points available when they need them because you get 1/10 of a point for adding a book and International mooches give/cost 3 points.

[dcgelfling]

I suspect going cold turkey on 'fun stuff' isn't likely to work out too well. Maybe try giving yourself $25 or 50 per month as an allowance (or whatever you can live with, but I'd go with less than half that $400), and sink the rest of it into the debt. Pull the allowance out as cash, and don't pay for anything that falls into the 'fun stuff' category except from that cash.

Also, make friends with your library and if you're anything like me, use what's already in your stash instead of buying new supplies (not that I'm very good at that one, either, but I try).

[alexseanchai]

But how am I to buy things online with cash that's in my purse? Which is my problem. I buy things online and put them on my credit cards.

...that's the point, isn't it.

Thanks!

[jamethiel]

One thing you might look at, if your bank offers it, is a Visa/mastercard Debit card. I have one--for everything where I'm reasonably certain the website is secure, I use my Debit card. That way it's taking money directly out of my bank account, and I'm not adding to my credit card debt

[alexseanchai]

I have a debit card, I just don't use it, because my credit cards have rewards programs. Which just got a reinforcement because I got enough points on the one card for a $50 B&N gift card.

I should start using the debit card instead, yes.

[lassarina]

I strongly advise against using a debit card online ever. If anyone ever hacks your $site_of_choice and gets your debit card, you can be responsible for everything the hacker uses that card to purchase. With credit cards, you are limited to (I believe) no more than $50 USD no matter how many hundreds of thousands a hacker rings up.

An alternate suggestion would be--I think AmEx does a special type of card where you can't use it anymore until you pay it off in full. It might be possible to get one of those, cut up the existing ones (keep the account open but never use the card, if you're concerned about your credit rating), and go that way.

[morgandawn]

I'd set a small monthly spending limit for the fun stuff ($50 month) and buy prepaid credit cards for each month. tuck away the higher credit limit credit card in a place that is very hard to access.) Then use the prepaid cards - one each month.
http://www.creditscorequick.com/blog/2010/08/29/5-tips-to-the-perfect-prepaid-credit-card/ (I am nor endorsing any the site - there are many places so shop around)

You can also get a prepaid debit card
http://www.bankrate.com/finance/credit-cards/don-t-overpay-for-prepaid-debit-cards-1.aspx

[alexseanchai]

Thanks!

[alexseanchai]

Taken into consideration. Thanks!

[carodee]

You could try automatic payments to your credit card company if you think you can keep enough in your account to avoid overdrafts. If you know the money already committed, you can't use it.

Another possibility is not carrying your credit card around with you or, if you need to carry it for emergencies, put it in a gift card envelope that you tape shut. The ten second delay as you work it open may give you time to remember why you don't want to impulse shop.

BTW, you should allow yourself some mad money, otherwise this will get too restrictive quickly and you won't be able to do it long-term.

[alexseanchai]

Automatic payments makes sense. *goes off to figure out how to do that*

Gift card envelope. I can do that.

Thanks!

[carodee]

Something else that occurred to me after I commented. You could write the total you still owe on the gift card envelope. Looking at that and thinking of making the number even higher would make me think twice! *g*

You're welcome and good luck!

[alexseanchai]

Heh, yeah.

[zillah975]

What helped me was to figure out what I was actually doing. Now, it may be that all you're doing is having impulse-control issues, in which case maybe redirecting the impulses to other places? Like, when you have the impulse to buy something, go do something else you enjoy instead -- pick up one of the books you already bought but haven't read yet, or watch a favorite movie, or call a friend, or write a story, something like that.

For me, my impulse-buying was a control thing. There were things I wanted or needed that were out of my control, that I couldn't get, but buying something, that was in my control. I walk in the store, I pick something out, I give them my money, and the thing is now mine. It was like a drug, and also with the nasty hangover that drugs can give you.

I could never convince myself I didn't need the things I wanted. Either I knew I didn't need them but I couldn't stop wanting them, or I felt too strongly that I really did need them. In the latter case, once I could sit down and show myself how it was that I didn't need it, I still felt like I needed it.

So the only way I could stop was to find something else to focus on. For me, it was something I could control: I started writing stories. This gave me that same sense of control that buying things did. If your impulse buying is really about something else, figuring out what that is may help you figure out how to redirect it to something that doesn't cost money. If it's just about wanting things, then maybe just finding a way to distract yourself with something else you also want or enjoy, something that costs less or (preferably) nothing -- like reading, or movies, or calling friend, and so on. Think of it like breaking any other habit, like smoking or biting your nails. It takes work, and mindfulness, and also a great deal of self-distraction or redirection. :)

I'm sending you good thoughts!!

[alexseanchai]

This...shall take contemplation. Thanks!

[erika]

Thanks for commenting about this. It's already helped me!

[carolyn_claire]

Focus on paring down rather than adding to. Every day, go through a drawer, a closet, a box, and get rid of some things. Setting a daily goal, like 10 things, or five, or even two or three, will get you started. If it's more convenient, keep a box to collect the outgoing items (if they're donatable) and drop them off weekly. Declutter the heck out of your home and your life. Some people I know have also made a rule that for everything new that does come into the house, something they already have has to go out. Those are all ways of dealing with clutter, primarily, but I've found that when I'm working at getting rid of things the urge to get more things decreases. You'll also come across things that still have more value to you than you realized, like shopping your stuff. Set goals to use what you have before you can get any more, especially with crafting supplies (you should see my fabric and pattern stash!) And organize things so that you can see what you have. You'll be more likely to use it and maybe less likely to buy something you already have enough of.

[alexseanchai]

*nods* Thanks!

[vass]

Kareila is right about the merits of compulsive wishlist-keeping. I have a Delicious tag called 'shopping' in which I bookmark everything have a passing urge to buy, as a surrogate for actually buying it. When I have the money and want to splurge, or when someone asks me "what do you want for your birthday?" I then consult the shopping tag and see what still appeals to me and is within the budget. I also keep a wishlist at the Book Depository.

What also helps me is to think of it as a fun challenge, not deprivation. I like to see just how cheaply I can get something. For instance, if I want a book, first I check the online catalogue at the two nearest library systems, then friends and family who could loan it to me, and if they don't have it I'll compare AbeBooks and the Book Depository and see which one has it cheaper, including shipping.

For CDs and DVDs, if the library doesn't have them, online is usually cheaper than brick and mortar stores, so I just don't browse in brick and mortar stores any more.

For craft supplies, how's your stash? Could you work on trying to use it up before you buy anything more? Or if that's too hard, make a rule that for every new project you buy, you have to complete two existing projects?

[alexseanchai]

I don't have existing projects as such. I do jewelry, and if I put the project down before I'm finished, all the beads slip off the cord or the pin or whatever and then it's all to do again and also there are beads underfoot and I'll never find them all. My stash is fairly substantial but it never seems substantial enough.

Ooh, challenge to see how cheaply something can be gotten. I like that idea.

[jamethiel]

Dead comm is dead cause I went and got myself into debt after getting myself out of it! Feeling a bit sorry for myself, but I'm back and making an effort again!
My suggestions? First, stop spending. Take your credit card out of your wallet and put it somewhere safe. Personally, I keep mine in the freezer in a block of ice--if I really, really need it, it takes 24 hours to defrost (can't microwave it, it fries the card). I've never had anything urgent urgent that's come up that's needed more notice than that.

Secondly, give yourself some slack. You say you've got $400 spare. Maybe put $200 of that on the credit card (an automated transfer as soon as your pay comes in?), and then $125 in a high interest savings account where you can't access it immediately (I use ING, but whatever has no fees/high interest). I actually find the "1 business day" thing works well for me. I transfer money in there, then schedule it for transfer out two days before my bills have to be paid. That way I do pay things, but I don't spend the money on other stuff.

Use the remaining $75 for luxuries. But don't them impulse luxuries. What everyone else has said with the craft stuff is right--make sure you finish two before you buy another one. Make lists. Plan your next purchase--you'll get so much more enjoyment out of that!

[alexseanchai]

My problem is mostly online shopping, and my favorite stores all have my credit card information saved, or they take Paypal.

Savings. I keep meaning to do savings. I've got an Ally account I should resurrect.

Thanks!

[jamethiel]

Paypal is good, if you use the direct debit option--it's not adding to your debt. And if you keep within your limits, no harm, no foul!

No savings is the reason I got into debt again. I got out of debt, and had to move suddenly. It went on the credit card, and then it took AAGES to figure out my budget living by myself and in the meantime, the debt crept up and up and up...

So now I'm starting to pay it down again. But I'm doing it in a 2/3 1/3 way. 1/3 towards savings, the rest towards the card. In the month I've been doing it, it's already had an effect--my previously maxed out card has $200 free and I have the month from HELL this month (really big unexpected bills) but I have enough savings to get through it.

[alexseanchai]

Glad you're doing well.

[neekabe]

I've found that translating prices into time helps. "I make the equivalent of $x/hr. This item costs $2x. Would I be willing to work 2 extra hours for this item?". It helps me shift the focus to what things actually cost as opposed to just paying attention to whether I have enough money in the account for it.

[alexseanchai]

That makes a great deal of sense. Thanks!

[shadowandflame]

You can also try translating your hourly wage into what you make per hour after accounting for your nondiscretionary expenses (like rent).

To take a simplified example: if you made $10/hour, and worked 150 hours/month, your income would be $1500/month. If your rent was half of that, you'd have $750 left to spend on Everything Else...so you're really only making $5/hour to pay for that "Everything Else," and the number of hours you actually have to work to afford something (after taking your rent expense out) doubles.

And of course, there are nondiscretionary expenses other than rent, too...

This is a little depressing in the "I only make that much per hour?!" sort of way, but it has sometimes deterred me from buying something that I would have bought if I'd been calculating its cost in terms of the "hours I have to work to earn this" using my total hourly wage (minus taxes). In reality, I don't have that total hourly wage available to me for "play" money; I only have whatever's left over after paying the bills.

[alexseanchai]

That also makes a great deal of sense. I think I'll use the $5/hr figure; it's probably less than the actual figure, once I factor out rent and car payment and car insurance and so forth, but that's a good thing.

[elf]

re: books--You could spend the rest of your life reading free, high-quality ebooks, either with an ebook reader (something of an initial expense; call it $75-$150) or on your computer.

Finding them can be a bit of a search (which, if you decide you like hunting down free good ebooks, can distract you from other online shopping that costs money), but there's plenty of resources to get started.

I've kept my online purchases down by mostly using PayPal--and I don't have it tied to a credit card, so it takes 3-5 days for a deposit to clear and get added to the PayPal. When it gets low, I can't just jump it back up. (May not work for you. However, having a PayPal account that I've tagged as "this is for online stuff only," that doesn't connect to money-in-the-bank or money-on-the-cards, has helped.)

I've used the "this will cost me 2 hours of work" method with some success.

[alexseanchai]

Thanks!

[alicit]

And, regarding ebooks, you can even download free reader applications to your phone. I have both Kindle and Aldiko on my Android and I'm really happy with them. Not only can I get cheap or free ebooks, but I don't need to carry any extra gadgets!

[pwcorgigirl]

The advice already given is really excellent. Direct payment on your debt and putting the card somewhere not readily accessible both work very well, as does schooling yourself to read the books you've already bought and use up craft supplies on hand.

I give myself some mad money for internet spending by buying a Barnes & Noble gift card for $25 and a Visa pre-paid debit card for $50 three or four times a year. The money to buy these comes out of my cash pocket money, and I tend not to blow them because of having to scrimp just a little bit to buy them. It connects credit to real money that I've handled, and that does make a difference in curbing wasteful spending.

Going to your favorite internet stores and changing your credit card information to what's on your pre-paid card will bring the internet impulse buying to a screeching halt. It's a pain to have to switch it back, and that few minutes of delay is crucial to thwarting impulse buying.

[alexseanchai]

Hm. I like these ideas. Thanks!

[bronze_ribbons]

I sometimes pretend I'm moving. Helps me both let go of things I no longer like/use but have sentimental attachment to, and (even harder) the things I haven't yet read/used but am unlikely to get to within the next couple of years.

It helps that I really, really hate moving. And in 2000 I did it twice, and then in 2008 I had to clean out my mom's house, which meant making hard choices about what I could realistically keep and still have room in my own pad for the other things that matter to me. :-/

[alexseanchai]

I'm used to moving. Air Force brat. And we have boxes in the basement that haven't been opened in fifteen years, which means...ten moves? But I take your point.

[all_adream]

For real, I think a lot of people are completely mistaken about "etsy and other places to buymycrap will keep me wealthy/having a steady income/be an actual means of making serious money". Truly, it depends on there being tons of people with ready cash who are dying to buy that stuff, and frankly, if everyone makes the same/close-enough sort of knitting/necklaces/remade teeshirts/whatever, and almost no one has a bunch of cash to spend on these same things which etsy proves many people can make at home quite easily, then...no capitalism for you. *shrug* I think that's a harsh truth which people simply are not seeing clearly. It's turned into sort of an economy of wishful thinking, and no steady "I do five hours work and I get $73.00 guaranteed" or whatever. So, I believe that taking that "Hey, I *might* sell serious stuff on etsy/ebay/whatever today, without completely changing my view and approach" view is not a recipe for guaranteed success, *if* it gives you the mistaken notion that you do/will/might have more income than you reallyreally have. Just something that I have found people to get in trouble with--good luck!